Clive, Iowa
November 12, 2016
Letter to my Fellow Americans – who voted for Donald J. Trump:
When the most damning evidence of Mr. Trump’s lack of character was made public weeks ago I started a letter to the editor in my head. Essentially what I wanted to say was this: Our elected leaders who stand with Mr. Trump are supporting a racist, bigoted misogynist, and a pathological liar. The failure to classify his behaviors over the course of the campaign and his public life as anything other than this description is at best ignorant, at worst complicit. I wanted to close this letter urging my fellow Iowans to reject all of the candidates on the ballot this year who fail to reject Mr. Trump.
I never got around to sending that letter just like I never got around to putting that Hillary sticker on my car. There was so much written, broadcast, and discussed about how hideous Mr. Trump’s campaign had become I didn’t feel I had much to add. Plus, I didn’t want to offend you. Even after eight years of listening patiently to your racist, sexist, violent and bigoted rhetoric directed not at an ideology or a set of policies, but a man.
Here is where I have to tell you how offended I am by your action. While you spent the last eight years maligning a respectable and capable man, you also couldn’t help inflicting collateral damage on the office, itself. And now, after acclimating yourself to its debasement, you saw the Presidency to be such a demeaned thing that you could find a man fundamentally not worthy of our respect, worthy of it. You have elected to represent all of us as leader of the free world a man whose behavior, words, and deeds would not be tolerated in any elementary school classroom.
Would you allow your daughters to be groped by my sons? Would you ask that I tolerate the level of dishonesty he consistently demonstrates among my students? Would you tolerate his level of vulgarity from a high school debater?
Years ago civic, education, and political leaders – many of them Republican – got behind an initiative for teaching civic values to young people called Character Counts. There are six ethical values that “everyone can agree upon.” Trustworthiness, Respect, Responsibility, Fairness, Caring, and Citizenship. By any measure our next president has failed in every one of these areas – big time. Of course you will point to my candidate and say the same. But Mr. Trump’s failures in the areas of Respect, Fairness, and Caring specifically are beyond the pale or comparison.
When I woke Wednesday morning I was in tears for our children. I cannot explain this world of adults who not only tolerate this behavior, they seem to revel in it. The worse Mr. Trump acted, the more you adored him. So again our children are failed by our ‘do as I say, not as I do’ hypocrisy. So I ask you with all sincerity: What do you plan to say to your children to explain why someone of such established grotesque character was found worthy (once again, not by most Americans) of being our leader and representative to the world? What conclusion do you expect they’ll come to when they see a black man of great character reviled, and a white man of repugnant character celebrated? How do you reconcile this hypocrisy?
Ultimately, what has upended my world-view and disturbed my soul is that I have finally become fully aware who you are. I ignorantly saw you as ‘the other’ for so long: the white guy of a certain age in a pick-up truck. I ignorantly assumed your racism, sexism, and xenophobia was something isolated to the rural counties, the less educated parts of white society, and areas with white nationalists that I wouldn’t know how to find and rarely would travel.
What has so shaken me is that you are so close to me: you are my doctor, my uncle, my cousin, my co-worker, my teammate, my children’s teacher, my student’s parent, my fellow parishioner, my neighbor. I realize that I can’t live in a world without you and even if I could wish you away I wouldn’t. I love you and it brings me to tears.
This love requires me to forgive, not to hate. It requires me to empathize, if not to agree. It requires me to dialogue, not to close you off. I’m not sure what else to write or say just yet because I am too raw and immature to attempt the answers on my own. But I do have a good start: I will refocus my efforts on telling the truth and fostering loving relationships.
I have held my tongue for far too long in an effort not to offend you. In doing so I have fallen short of living my most deeply held standards and beliefs in the misplaced assumption that I will lose the benefits of our relationship. But from now on I pledge that fear will no longer make me a hypocrite to my beliefs. Without fear of offending you or our new president, instead I choose to love you and your chosen leader. I choose to live in peace and harmony rather than anger. I hope that by doing so you may consider to do the same.
With love and determination,
Christian Baughman
Great post!
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Thank you J
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Your man of great character used his pen and his phone to undermine our system, to advance an agenda the people’s representatives did not prefer, to stuff his (your?) progressive beliefs down the throats of Americans from a majority of states who thought differently. He saw great flaws in Hillary 8 years ago but somehow came to describe her as “the most qualified candidate ever”. Give us a break!
As for Hillary, Benghazi, the Make Me a Millionaire Foundation, “Basket of Deplorables” and your man of great character did her in. A majority of voters in a majority of states said no more.
Of course Trump’s actions were alarming, but less alarming than a 3rd Obama term and putting an enabler of even worse behavior, that her then President spouse exhibited in the 1990s, into the White House.
But, your man of great character said that elections have consequences so dry your tears and see if the people’s choice from a vast majority of states can get our country back on the tracks our founders laid and the people want. We both don’t want to see him fail.
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No, we do not wish for failure. However, you must lest go of your hate if you wish to truly dialogue. I am glad to go back and forth with you about policies, ideas, and values. But, if you want to communicate with the plurality of this country you must set aside your vilification of the personalities and engage us with respect. Thank you for your comments.
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my Iowa cousin shared this and it speaks to my experiences in rural eastern North Carolina. I’m sharing your thoughts instead of my own. I thank you.
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Thank you Sarah. Please keep the dialogue going. Peace.
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So sad that u are so blinded to the flaws of your candidate. I would suggest you start investigating the truth about the Clintons. Believe it or not I didn’t want to vote for Trump and neither did my friends who voted for him. We all felt we had no choice. Perhaps you should try to find out why we felt that way
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Gary, I think this is the crux of the issue. I need to understand your point of view just as much as I want you to understand mine. What sources would you have me go to to learn more?
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Reblogged this on 365daysofkindness and commented:
I feel like the blogger reached into my head and heart and wrote down all my thoughts and feelings. Thank you Christian
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I have a blog as well 365 days of kindness, and while my family and I are still on our path of a kind act every day, I have had a hard time blogging about it because of the election. Everything I wrote became a political statement and that is not what I wanted from my blog. After the election, in my state of grief, I have not been able to write anything. This post said everything my head and heart wanted to say. Thank you for this!
Mandi- Wisconsin
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Mandi, I am glad that it resonated for you. Continue to focus on the good. We shall overcome this too. Peace
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The people have spoken we don’t want a felon/liar with a perverted husband/partner to lead us anymore and especially succeed an incompetent street organizer
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Wow! I had never known about your blog before, and I’m so glad to have happened upon it. Knowing you personally for years, having great respect and admiration for you as a human, as an educator, as a colleague, and as a friend, your words are consistent with your life journey. As a lifelong “R” who absolutely could not vote for our current President, your message resonates strongly with me. (At the state level right now, I’m humiliated and disgusted to call it “my party”, except for the six “R”s who actually voted “no”.) I am so sad for our country and our state, yet hopeful that the pendulum has swung far enough that many will make a decision to love, not hate, listen, not yell, and work together to build goodness in our world. It may be a long slog through a lot of muck to get there though. Hugs to you!! Thank you for sharing.
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